Men coping with the effects of childhood sexual abuse can have a hard journey ahead of them. Men are expected to be mentally and physically tough and always in control – society doesn’t readily see them as victims. Male victims of childhood sexual abuse will often feel helpless and carry shame and guilt for what happened.
Many men who were sexually abused when young remain isolated and distressed by those memories. Feelings of anxiety and secrecy can affect them into adulthood. Some men have a sense of loss or confusion around their confidence, masculinity or sexuality. Many try to calm these feelings of distress with alcohol, drugs and gambling.
There is a way to deal with these feelings. It means recovering from the experiences rather than trying to “cover them up”. Seeking help from an experienced counsellor can be a good first step. Also many men find that talking with other males who have been through a similar experience can be a safe, effective and fulfilling step in their recovery.
A WAY FORWARD
SAMSN is organising facilitated peer-support groups for men who were sexually assaulted when they were young. The groups are based on more than a decade of successful groups run by Psychologist Mark Griffiths through the Sexual Assault Service at the Royal Prince Alfred Hospital in Sydney. Hundreds of men found support through these meetings. Mark is now assisting SAMSN to run similar groups; each group will have two experienced facilitators to guide the two-hour meetings that will run for eight consecutive weeks.
There will be guidelines to ensure confidentiality and a structure that ensures the whole focus of the groups is SAFETY. No matter what the details of your abuse, you can contact SAMSN about joining. Acceptance is an important feature of our joint recovery so the groups are open to men from different cultures and sexual orientation.
For any man who has suffered from the effects of child sexual abuse, you should know it was not your fault and that we believe your healing is possible.